Welcome to Right-On with HFG Happy Families Support Network Inc. (HFG)
HFG is a not-for-profit support group that provides ongoing support to women and children who have experienced abuse
HFG is a free support group for women and children who have experienced abuse, run by women who have experienced abuse
The topic for today is – Understanding & Working Through Emotional Triggers
How do you feel when you have to deal with your abuser? Do you panic? Get sweaty palms? Have problems breathing?
Do you ever try to write a simple email to your abuser and can’t seem to find the words?
Do you read emails from your abuser and immediately feel fear, depression, or anger?
Have you ever thought you saw your abuser coming towards you on the street and panicked? Unable to move?
Are there smells, colours, objects, music, movies, sounds that sends you in a tailspin because it reminds you of being abused?
When you think of emotional triggers what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Button pushing…right?
Have you ever said: “they just know how to push my buttons” those buttons are your emotional triggers
Emotional triggers in response to your abuser is something that takes you back to feeling the pain and fear of abuse
Emotional triggers causes you to react in the same way you did when you were with your abuser and felt powerless
Emotional triggers are people, events, things, words, music, etc., that causes intense emotional reactions
How can you manage your emotional triggers
First you need to understand what it is that is triggering these strong emotional reactions and why
Then you need to work on removing or reversing your reactions to these emotional triggers
Try to keep a journal and track your emotional triggers. When and how often they happen and what you are reacting to
Get help with managing your emotional triggers. Try therapy or join a support group
A domestic abuse support group is a safe place to work out coping strategies and solutions to your emotional triggers
Work on changing how you react to emotional triggers at your own pace. Be patient and gentle with yourself
Find activities that are enjoyable and soothing that you can use to self sooth when experiencing intense emotions
LEARN TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELF. Practice with your support group. Write an email to yourself about how you feel
When responding to emails from your abuser, pretend you’re writing to someone else and be honest. SPEAK OUT!
Don’t internalize natural consequences that should happen to your abuser, let them happen and free your emotions
CHANGE YOUR INNER DIALOGUE. You are in charge of your destiny. Use positive and empowering thoughts
Say these to yourself regularly – I AM IMPORTANT. I DESERVE RESPECT. I AM STRONG. I AM A GOOD COMMUNICATOR
Establish boundaries for dealing with emotional triggers, always give yourself a chance to walk away, hang up the phone, etc.
Make time for self-care. Relax, listen to music, draw/doodle, read, do yoga or meditate after experiencing emotional triggers
Remind yourself that you are no longer in the abusive situation and you are free to walk away at will
Remind yourself that you have the power to control how you respond to your emotional triggers
When experiencing intense emotional reactions BREATHE! Take deep breaths, slowly, in & out to help calm you down
Give yourself time to heal and learn strategies to deal with your emotional triggers
You’re not alone. Remember YOU ARE STRONG. YOU CAN DO THIS!
Join the conversation. Email your stories, comments and questions to right-on@hfgfamilies.com
Thanks for joining Right-On with HFG
We look forward to seeing you next Wednesday November 26 for our weekly Right-On conversation
The topic for next week is – Why Do You Stay?
This question is asked regularly so let’s explore possible reasons
If you would like your story featured in next Wednesday’s Right-On please email your story to right-on@hfgfamilies.com
Please email your questions and comments to right-on@hfgfamilies.com
If you would like more information on the HFG support group please email info@hfgfamilies.com
Have a great day! HFG Hugs!!
